I Don't Know What This Is About

Let me preface this by saying I've had an appreciable quantity of beer. If you're ever in Boulder you need to have a beverage at the Mountain Sun. They brew their own beer and rootbeer (the rootbeer I did not partake in today.) It's really good and locally owned by a 'shroom and marijuana loving gay man named Kevin who treats his employees well! Though he'll never remember you, no matter how many times you meet him.

The Tarahumara Indians of the Sierra Madre believe that anything you say or do while under the influence of alcohol is not your responsibility. It has something to do with an evil spirit taking over your body or some such bullshit. Let's say I subscribe to that.

Now that I've given myself a license to say anything I want, I can't think of a goddamn thing to say. Isn't that always the way of it? I think this blog is becoming my shrink. I'm posting too many times a day.

I could expound upon the virtues of beer. I wish I could be this loose all the time. I feel good, confident, happy-go-lucky. I feel aggressive. So maybe that's not such a good thing to feel all the time, but it sure feels awesome right now.

I think my job - well, office jobs in general - are emasculating. Now here's a topic I've been wanting to cover! Now I'm not one of those that thinks a woman's place is in the home barefoot and pregnant, nor do I think that men have to have some kind of hyper-masculine persona to be a man. However, I do think that these days in American society the line is blurring between masculinity and femininity and, for whatever reason, I don't like it. Ever wonder if the human race is evolving toward some kind of homogeneous, boring blend? Kinda like those big-eyed gray aliens that were so popular in the 1980's and '90's? I'm going to sound like a total backwoods redneck, but I don't like it when I can't tell if a person is male or female. Women wear t-shirts, men have long hair, everyone's got tattoos and nose rings. (Geez sound just like three generations of Roberts'.) Why are so many people in our society either so fat that men and women both have boobs, or so thin that neither have boobs? I understand we have the freedom of choice and I support that, but you know I really like it when men are masculine and women are feminine. Even the animal world often has lines of demarcation beyond mere sex organs: generally speaking males are vivid and colorful and love to show off, and females aren't. Usually the males are bigger than the females and are in control, but in some species it's exactly the opposite. Whatever the arrangement, I don't care. I just like that there's often a clear difference, certain unspoken rules for each. I'm not advocating helpless women, and I don't have a problem with bull dykes per se. Same goes for men - some are overly macho while others couldn't fight their way out of a wet paper bag. You are who you are. I guess the problem I have is with the homogenization of society. (Though I am a stickler, perhaps irrationally so, on some points. For example, women should not wear cowboy hats, period. There is no discussion here. And anything pink is most certainly not a cowboy hat.) And there's a whole list of things men should not wear, including short shorts (though honestly I'm not a fan of shorts in general.) Do I think people should be outcast from society for going against this? Of course not. Do I think they're "evil" or "wrong?" Certainly not. I just think it's nice for people to put some effort into their appearance and to do things to accentuate their unique qualities. That's all. Does it sound like I'm trying to cover up a bigotry streak? God I hope not.

I've got female friends, who I won't name here, who talk all about being a feminist and then turn around and absolutely revel in using their long eyelashes and sensuous curves to entice men into opening doors and doing other things for them. I think it's funny. I'm not picking, I'm just saying that I know that even among at least some feminist types the desire for that dividing line is still there. If nothing else, it's fun. It gives us a bit more of a heightened sense of belonging to a special group, of not being just like every other biped on the planet. I see nothing wrong with that.

Anyway, back to emasculating office jobs. I hate them. It's not masculine OR feminine to be pecking away at a computer all day. It's like we're all robots on an assembly line, each doing our own specialized task. Sex and physical strength have nothing to do with anything in that world. Hell, even a face has nothing to do with anything. All you need to be able to do is hit the right keys in the right order to get the desired outcome. A lot of people come to work in t-shirts, men and women. This one guy I work with looks like he rolls out of bed every morning and into whatever is lying on the floor. He's a brilliant programmer, so why do I care that he looks like white trash? I don't know. There's also a woman who dresses exactly the same way. They could share a wardrobe and no one would know the difference.

I think there is a liberal and a conservative duking it out in my head and beer just let's their battle come a little closer to the surface. The liberal wants to do the right thing, educate himself and spread peace and happiness. The conservative, at the very least, just wants to hold on to at least some of the old ways. I mean, let's take food for an example. What happens when our attitude toward food is "anything goes?" You end up with McDonald's and a nation full of obese citizens. Just because we can, does that mean we should? Why do some people (myself included) put so much emphasis on eating locally and organically, on insisting that food be prepared by hand, and that it actually be attractive when served? I mean there's a McDonald's on every corner. Why not save myself a lot of time, effort and money? Food is food, right? Does it matter if it's grown on a farm and prepared by loving hands or grown in a factory and processed by machines? Why do I care that my food be served at a real table, often with flowers from my garden and natural beeswax candles from the local honey guy? Presentation doesn't change the nutritional content of the food. So what's the deal? I think those "extras" make the whole experience somehow more special, more wonderful. I mean, isn't part of what makes us human the fact that we don't just stand in a field and graze? Or tear a cow apart and eat its flesh while the heart is still beating? Or for that matter, just pop a pill for a meal? How enjoyable would that be? Why did we develop culture in the first place? Why do cookbooks always show beautifully presented food, and pastoral images like chickens wandering in green pastures on an idyllic farm? Why don't they show the truth: half dead chickens suffering by the millions on a disassembly line of death? It's the same food, right? Why did we develop rules for eating and dressing and speaking in the first place? I think those things are very important. No, we shouldn't be like the Puritans in our rigidity, but can't there be some kind of compromise where people dress nice and make a big deal out of food because they want to instead of because they have to? Or what about the opposite extreme (from the Puritans) where no one thinks twice if there's a 300 pound woman walking down the street wearing spandex? Where's the middle ground?

I guess this all goes back to me feeling like we're steadily taking the humanity out of what it means to be human. I like it when a man says, "Yes sir" and wears a starched shirt. It shows (to me anyway) that he cares enough not to just say, "yeah dude whatever." It says he has some degree of respect for me as a fellow human being. I like pretty women who fuss about their shoes or their hair, because to me it says she cares about making both herself and society just a little bit more special than it needs to be (society by virtue of her appearance in it.) Life isn't about just surviving, and it certainly isn't about getting by with the least amount of effort or discomfort. Nowhere in nature is that written. So why not be like the peacock and spread those gloriously showy feathers from time to time? Life is hard enough. Isn't it our right, our natural calling even, to bring a little more beauty into the world?

Comments? Anyone?